My Heart Belongs to Daddy

The large women had a name and it was Maria. Maria turned out to be a sweetheart and I ended up talking to her all night until the place closed and we had to leave. She reminded me of The Gossip’s vocalist Beth Ditto, who I’m a big fan of, and we just totally clicked on a friendly level. Now I’m regretting that I didn’t ask for her number.

The Ambassador called me and we talked for almost an hour. I like that she always has interesting things to and she is a good listener. A rare combination. Most people hear but they don’t listen. She informed me that she booked a ticket to Stockholm on the 20th and would stay for the weekend. Great, that means that I have something to look forward to! Jay thought that I should demand that The Ambassadors children, 14 and 16 years old, call me ‘dad’. That’s not a bad idea actually but I don’t think she will invite them to join her on this trip...

Making An Effort

After work I went home to get ready for research night. I have to admit I was nervous but made sure that I looked the part in corset and panties from Agent Provocateur, silk stockings, stiletto boots and a whip. Appearance is everything. I hid it all under a beige trench coat and called a cab.

Jay was already there when I arrived and I could see that she also had made an effort with her appearance. An effort in not making any effort! She was wearing black jeans, a t-shirt and was arguing with the bouncer who wouldn’t let her in because of the strict dress code. I paid the cab driver and went up to the bouncer and Jay.
”I can see that you really made an effort, how nice of you!” I whispered ironically to Jay.
I turned to the bouncer, a big butch with a shaved head and tattoos all over, and smiled my sweetest smile.
”I’m sorry but it is our first time. Is there anything we can do?”
She looked at me in a way that made me very nervous, which I’m sure she noticed.
”Well, it depends on what you are wearing.”
I opened my coat and she nodded.
”I think I have something your friend can borrow.”
She handled me a black rubber shirt and a police badge.
”She can change there.” She pointed.
”Thank you!” I said gratefully.
We where in!

Jay wasn’t too fond of the rubber shirt but her mood went up when she saw the police batch.
”This is great, I've always dreamt of wearing one of these!” She was all exited.
”Can I have a beer now?” She wanted to know.
”You can have as many as you like if you only stay in the bar!” I was angry with her for not making an effort and now I wanted to do my research on my own.
I gave the bartender my card and told her that Jay could order what she wanted.
”You stay right here like a good girl!” I spanked her playfully with the whip on her butt.

I started to look around and found a lot of interesting stuff. A couple where one of the women was leading the other in a leash passed me and I could see a young woman cleaning another young woman’s boot with her tongue. That can not be good for the leather! I would never ruin a nice pair of boots like that I concluded. Went up by a staircase and found a girl with pigtails in her hair and a pink skirt, no panties, on a big swing getting fucked by a fat woman in a latex suite with a strap. She seemed to enjoy herself. I never have been a voyager so I sneaked down again. Everywhere I went there were weird stuff going and the highlight of the night was the puppy race, where 10 puppy girls competed for first place. The price? A bowl of dog food.
After almost 3 hours I’ve had seen enough. Jay had kept her promise to stay in the bar. She was in the best of moods, getting a foot massage from a very attractive girl.
Jay spotted me.
”Hey, there you are!” She said
”This place is great; we have to come more often!”
”Sure, but I really want to go now.” I was tired and my feet were sore from the stilettos. Those boots was definitely made for lying down and not for standing up.
”Please let’s stay for a bit. I can get you one of those too” she nodded towards the massage girl.
That was actually nothing that I wanted more than to get out of the boots and a foot massage.
”Ok, lets stay for a while!” I gave in.
Jay snapped her fingers and before I could change my mind a very large women emerged and started to take my boots of…

Finding Fifi

Good news: I already got nearly 30 applications for the housing position
Bad news: They are ALL men

I read all the applications and couldn’t help getting infectious by their enthusiasm. This was exactly the spirit I was looking for! One in particular got my attention. A 33 year old chef specializing in sea foods and French cuisine. I immediately ordered him to send me a picture to ensure that his looks wouldn’t make me loose appetite. No point in having your private chef otherwise. He sent me some pictures of his face and in full length in different situations. A total hunk! I couldn’t believe my luck. Even if I’m lesbian I appreciate aesthetic qualities in any form. I gave him a call and granted him an audience with me. He only had 2 requests; the first one was to always call me 'Madame' and the second one was for me to call him 'Fifi'. I could live with that…

I realized I'm far too inexperienced at this BDSM thing to pull it through and therefore needed to do some research on the subject. After all, my very own (free of charge) maid and chef was on the line. This was too good to take any chances. I talked Jay into going with me to Lash, a lesbian BDSM club that’s been running since way before this BDSM thing was getting fashionable and mainstream as it is today. She accepted but only after I promised to buy her all the beer she wanted for the rest of the week. Fab, fab, fab! We’re going tomorrow and the theme is ‘Puppy Play’. By the way.. what the fuck is that..?

French Maid

The last two days have been terrible. Didn’t feel human until today after all that partying on Sunday. I think it is because I’m getting older, when I was younger I could party much more. My apartment looks like shit and my Polish cleaning lady resigned by not showing up and not being able to get a hold on. I left several messages on her voice mail but she wont call me back so today I changed my locks. Now I need to find a new one but I need someone that is more committed. So I come up with this magnificent idea to put an ad on a BDSM community for a house slave. Preferably a gorgeous woman that would wear a french maid outfit, who can take care of my household and maybe give me some foot massages and manicure as well. I know they like stuff like that and in order to show my appreciation I would even let her be my footstool now and then. Only if she’d done a good job that day of course since it’s a reward thing. If she can cook that would be a big plus and maybe she could even serve at my dinner parties! That would be purrrrrrrfect!! She could even get a room in my flat and live here. I have too much space anyway…

Memory loss

Back in Stockholm and it feels wonderful. It is great to get out of town now and then but it is definitely better to get back. I left Mölle early in order to avoid the traffic and went straight to the office where I met up with Jay. She was lobbying for me to go with her to Patricia more than she was working. Patricia is a big boat with a restaurant, bars and nightclub and Sundays are gay nights. Mostly gay men and faghags but occasionally an exception from the rule (as myself) turns up. I told her that I would think about it if we could only finish the work that we were there to do. “Of course!” She said. “Why do you think I am here?”. I didn’t have a clue. Four hours later we had something that was presentable and we called it a day. I drove home for a shower and a change of clothes, made myself a drink and was starting to feel relaxed. If you are a lesbian and you want to be sure you get laid, under-dress is the way to do it. But on the other hand you can never be too over-dressed for the gay men. I decided to flirt with the later since I needed to feel human again after some days on the country side. Not in the mood for any short time fun any way. What I really needed was an alcoholic buzz and I was already on my way.

When I was ready I took a cab to Ekens bar to pick up Jay. I spotted her baseball cap and found her by a table with two blonde girls.
I ordered vodka with soda and joined them.
”You are here, finally! This is Marie and Camilla.” She was widely gesticulating.
”Hello Marie and Camilla, nice to meet you.” I smiled and shook their hands.
They were all getting drunk and I felt that I was far to sober for the company, so when Jay wanted to order shots for me I obliged.
The two blondes turned out to be quite entertaining (or maybe it was the shoots) so we invited them to come with us when we left for Patricia.

Patricia was packed with people but at this point I was drunk enough to not care. I lost the girls somewhere in between cheek kissing Fredrik and cheek kissing Marcus but found Joppe at the bar and everything was okay. Joppe immediately ordered a bottle of champagne and we where laughing, drinking and talking about a lot of important things of which I can’t remember anything. Suddenly somebody taps my shoulder and when I turned around my eyes met the brunette from last week. What was she doing here? Didn’t seem like her arena on any night and especially not on a gay night.
“I was hoping to see you here.” She said with a smile.
”Joppe this is…” fuck, I didn’t remember her name!
”Katja” she filled in.
“Very nice to meet you Katja!” Joppe asked the bartender for another glass and handed Katja some champagne.
She turned to me and whispered in my ear.
”I have to admit I’m a little offended.”
”I was hoping that I’ve made a good enough impression on you to remember my name”.
She said it in a very sexy way but I was not in the mood (read: sober enough) to play that game. I would love to, but not in the state I was in. I didn’t want to make a fool out of myself.
”Sorry if I disappointed you. Excuse me but I have to go and find someone.” I needed to get away from her ASAP.
I said goodbye to Joppe and went to look for Jay. I could feel Katja’s eyes in my back. Please, please, please don’t make me fall. I cursed my choice of footwear. From a distance I could see Jay with her baseball cap in the bar upstairs. She had her arms around the two blondes, both taller than her. Instead of going there I went outside and took a cab home.

I’m deeply concerned about this memory loss thing. Tomorrow I will schedule an appointment to make sure I don’t have Alzheimer…

Midsummer in Sweden

Had lunch at Grodan with the publishing executive today which was more interesting that I thought it would be. He wanted us to collaborate on this idea that he had and I would love to, if and only if I’ll get a bigger piece of the cake. I didn’t tell him right away though. Made sure to put some icing on it first and then I hit him with the 50/50 or no deal. He accepted and paid for the lunch. Turned my phone back on as I was on my way back to the office. A dirty text message from The Ambassador made me realize that I should schedule that weekend with her ASAP. That woman really knows how to push the right buttons. Big time. Didn’t respond since I had some work calls that needed to be prioritized. Crazy much to do before I’m leaving tomorrow. This year we’re going to Cecilia and Ninnis summer house in Mölle for the traditional ‘Swedish Midsummer’ celebration. Jay was supposed to come along with her girlfriend, but they desided to stay at home and cancelled last minute. Too bad. Jay can make any party a good one!

Christian called and said that the brunette from the other night has been asking about me. I was flattered but not impressed.
”Babe, I have sooooo much to do today, can we talk about that when I’m back?” I wanted to know.
”You are f-ing crazy!” He complained.
“This girl is one of the sexiest things I’ve ever seen and you want to talk about it when you get back?”
I could see him shake his head before my inner eye.
“Sorry but I really have to go.” I hung up.

Back in the office I found Jay telling Melissa, the receptionist, off.
”I told you never to buy any light products. Light is for fat people!”
I looked at Jay who is actually quite a large women.
”I know Jay but they where out of regular Coke.” Melissa sighed.
”It doesn’t matter, I don’t know how many times I've told you!” Jay stormed into our office and slammed the door.

I can feel that I really need to get away for a few days. So here I come to eat, drink and dance around the pole for the sake of the fertile soil!
Back in la Stockholmia on Sunday…

Gay Acting

Went with Christian and some friends for a private concert with Natasha Bedingfield at Café Opera last night. It was really good but it was too hot so we left after a couple of songs and went directly to the after party where we had a table waiting for us. Justin Timberlake was in town but nowhere in sight. Apparently he skipped the party (and his table) and went to the Beirut Café restaurant with his new girlfriend Jessica Biel. I don’t blame him. Those parties is about the same everywhere you go. The club manager was joining our company and hitting on me big time which was weird since he was so gay acting. Besides that he must have been the only one in the company not knowing that I’m gay. So I told him that I was playing for the all women team and (surprise, surprise) he was chocked.
“For real? You don’t look like a lesbian.” He said.
“That is so funny because you don’t look straight!” I replied.
At first I thought he was offended but then he started to laugh.
”Well I do get hit on by men all the time but I always took it as a compliment!” He smiled.
“And you should!” I smiled back at him.
His eyes tried to hold mine for a second too long but I made sure he failed his task. There was a very sexy brunette with amazing green eyes on the other side of me and way too sexy to ignore. She was in her mid twenties and wearing a short skirt and stilettos that made her already long, skinny legs even longer. I have to admit that I prefer gay women (they are so much better in bed) but for someone like her I was ready to make an exception! Later on that night when everybody was too drunk (or too coked up) to notice I let my hand slide under her skirt and whispered in her ear that I wanted her to spread her legs for me. She did and revealed a pair of silk panties that I later on would find out were pink. I could feel that she was already wet and that was my Q.
“Lets get out of here” I told her as I was standing up, holding out my hand for her to take.
She looked at me under her bangs and took it.
I didn’t say goodbye to my friends since it wasn’t necessary. We took a cab to my place and even if I couldn’t wait to get her out of her clothes I offered her some champagne which she accepted. I could tell that she was a little bit nervous but I soon made her forget all about that. She begged me for more with those sexy eyes of hers and her legs wrapped around me. So I gave in. After she had her third orgasm I got up and called her a cab. I thanked her for the night and told her the cab would take her wherever she wanted and that it was taken care of.
”I would prefer to stay the night…” she said looking more like a puppy than the sexy siren in my bed just minutes ago.
I placed a soft kiss on her lips but I didn’t say anything. I just handed her the coat and opened the door...

A little piece of paper

Jays foot was still swollen so I showed her some pictures of Elephantiasis, which made her schedule an appointment with her doctor the very same day. The doctor told her it was nothing serious, just an allergic reaction to an insect bite. She was very happy when she came back and soon showed me the real object of her excitement. A piece of toilet paper neatly folded together.
“What is that?” I wondered.
“Well, while I was at the doctors office I had to go to the bathroom”, she explained.
“As I was going in this gorgeous woman, a copy of Esther Canadas, came out the door. And guess what?”
“What?”
“There was some pee, just a little bit, on the ring so I wiped it up with this piece of paper and took it with me!” She was almost hyperventilating of excitement.
“Why would someone do anything as sick as that?” I wanted to know.
”I don’t know but it makes me feel closer to her somehow.”
“I really hope you washed your hands your sick puppy!” I was laughing so hard I almost wet myself.
“I’m not sure but I’ll do it now just in case.” And with a wide smile she carefully placed the toilet paper in the right pocket of her trousers and walked towards the bathroom.

While she was in the bathroom I went on the internet and googled Esther. Oh my fucking God! I want a piece of that paper too!! I was drooling over Esther when the publisher with the bad breath called. We scheduled our lunch for next week.

I left the office early to buy myself a new dress for the dinner party at Chez Stéphanes on Saturday. Jay left the office early too for, what I suspect, a beer in the sun. She asked if I wanted to join her later but I declined. I never have been much of a beer drinker…

Bigfoot

Jay and I went to a launch party yesterday for this new restaurant that was opening. She insisted of wearing her Havajanas since her left foot was all swollen and twice the size of the other one. I was ashamed of her footwear but have to give her credit for going anywhere with that foot in the first place. I was wearing a white linen suit and some high heel open sandals in soft orange suede from Ralph Lauren. Chic indeed! The restaurant was not more than 2 blocks from our office but since my sandals weren’t made for walking and Jay’s foot wasn’t either we took a cab. I got a little tipsy from the champagne and started to introduce Jay as Bigfoot. She wasn’t crazy about it and after I while I had to let it go. I mingled a little bit while Jay sat down to rest her foot and ran into a publishing executive that I met at a private party a month ago or so. He said that he had some collaboration ideas that he wanted to talk to me about so I gave him my card and asked him to call me tomorrow at the office. I guess I should have talked to him a little bit longer but I desperately needed to get away from his breath. Went back to Jay who was chatting up some young hot, obviously straight (but flattered), girl. I talked with them for a bit but the hottie was not hot enough to compromise for being so boring so I left. Went home and had a nice hot bath with a glass of Chablis before I went to bed. Dreamt about Bigfoot, the hairy one...

Vacation & Plans

Everybody is talking about their vacation plans and asking me about mine. I don’t have anything major planned and I don’t think I will. I told The Ambassador that a trip to France in July would be impossible to accomplish since the client wants the first draft ready for presentation in August. I can’t afford to jeopardize a contract in this caliber that could get our firm going for a whole year or more. She understood and I invited her to come visit me in Stockholm instead. No obstacles were the reply. Fab, fab, fab! I think older women are my new thing. I’ve come to realize that I definitely should date more of them. I like the combination of self confidence, knowing what they want and going for it. I’ve always said that I’m the catch and not the hunter...